i'd like to see a shrink, but before i do, i must subject myself to all manner of alarming recordings and menus. so much time and paper shuffling and button pressing all of the sake of...mental clarity. phew. i'm sure glad something in this world adds up. i was in such despair over our wilting, anemic health industry (sick industry? as in really, really sick? make that macabre industry.) that i pulled a luke and didn't put the no-splashy thing in the food processor before i turned it on to give my smoothie its smooth nature. up, up, up went the almond milk and pieces of frozen banana. smoothie rejoice! smoothie rapture! smoothie can fly!
hmm, there may be a lesson here. no, the lesson is not put lids on things before you electrically activate them. the lesson is clearly a far swishier deepak chopra–style allegory: the no-splashy thing is the insurance company, and they are trying to put a lid on my frozen bananas and almond milk and spirutein soy protein powder. i am the food processor (ha! processor! see? see?), and i have been told by society that i must constantly smoothify, make everything smooth, but maybe some things need to be upchucked so they can fly free, free! that is clearly what it all means.
confidential to dorothy: delete some email, bitch! my emails kept bouncing back, so i gave up and wrote to your yahoo account.
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